Mine is big enough, thanks.

Over the past few years I've become somewhat of a Francophile. One day I decided to change my computer's language to French in an attempt to immerse myself in the language. The only time I really had trouble was when I couldn't remember how to change it back. After an afternoon of fiddling in my control panel, following the icons that looked like they'd lead me to the languages, I eventually switched it back to English and that was that. However, ever since my Francophone adventure, emails have turned up in my junk mail written entirely au francais. It never occurred to me that spam came in different languages. I haven't bothered to find out what they say, but it's interesting nonetheless.

Another junk box mystery that I've never been able to solve is the gratuitous volume of emails I get concerning penis enlargement. These days, I find it amusing, but as a ten year old girl who didn't understand the male anatomy, I was horrified. Who was sending this? How did they find my email?  What's wrong with having a small penis? I've never received any offers for weight loss, soul mate searchers, or eager attractive women who will telephone naughty things to me for $5 a minute, so what makes these spammers believe that I am in need of enhanced genetailia? The subject lines vary from "Do YOU have a small PENIS?" to "Get 6 inches overnight!!!" to "MAKE HER SCREAM IN BED". I'm not bothered by the emails, like I said, I think it's funny, but I'd like to know how this started. Does everyone get these emails, or is someone out there spreading rumors about my manhood?